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Q&A -Parents’ concerns for their children and own emotion

01

What kinds of psychological problems can children develop if cannot go out of home for a long time?

A: There are few problems, which might come up but again depends on parent’s own previous emotional issues as well as their parenting style. Child’s personality is made up of both parent’s personality; therefore, child reaction might become similar to their parents way of coping with any difficult times. More relaxed and centered the parents, so as their children. Of course children gene, health condition and brain health may also impact on their emotion.
In current condition, children might feel boredom; show signs of anxiety, might show oppositional or aggressive behavior as well as becoming withdrawn, less talkative, develop insomnia and or other symptoms. If children develop problems such as bed-wetting, chewing nail, getting aggressive or angry, these signs might be related to anxiety or depression. 

02

The epidemic may not get better for a period of time. How adjust to tension and anxiety? How can adults avoid passing on their anxiety to their children?

A: All starts with parents taking care of their own emotion as well as setting up a daily routine for the whole family every day. Here are few tips parents can try:
a. Parents especially these days need to take good care of their own emotion as well as being more kind and understanding toward each other to reduce any marital conflict, which also can impact negatively on their children. Parent’s conflict is one the main source of stress and anxiety in children.

b. Parents can develop regular schedule of their own, just as they went to work before from 9-5. Do their work at home the best they can or engage on other activities to enhance their career. These days technology can help a lot with that. This could also help them to relax, become more hopeful, feel less anxious and less impact on their children emotion negatively.

c. Children also need to have regular school schedule on daily basis at home; however, at this time parents replace their teachers for the time being. Parents can follow school curriculum, teach the kids, test them, play with their kids and help them to learn in which time can pass by quick as well. Actually, this epidemic gave parents specially fathers to have extra time to build strong bond with their children in all aspects. Besides, this epidemic is not as bad as one thinks, so deal with it positively. You can do it!

d. *Have at least half an hour daily exercise schedule for whole family and kids included. Each member can suggest his or her favorite exercise for the group.
*Have daily family relaxation time or simple training.
*Have weekly round table talk for each family member to share his or her weekly experience
*All family including kids share housework chores.
*Parents can give token or little amount of money to their kids for each housework chore; this will help them to learn the value of money and savings.

e. Family needs to sleep before 11 pm and get up at 7:30, have breakfast and all get busy for the day.

03

Recently, many readers mentioned that they don’t dare to watch the news, they are scared and sad when they read more, while they are afraid to miss important information. How to deal with the feelings of fear and sadness, and do you recommend that people should control the time they put on paying attention to the epidemic every day?

A: By advancement in technology, internet, most people chose to be connected and that lead to the global world we are all in now. Therefore, we need to accept sharing the good and bad as a big global family. No one can guarantee what happens to us next in life, so as what happens to us when we cross the road, affected by natural disaster and or any epidemic. The bottom line is that, we are all responsible for our own safety, hygiene, learning disease prevention, happiness and have balance in our life. Watching news for epidemic in order to be informed is not a bad idea. It helps us better adjust with situation at hand. However, if person gets obsessed with these news then it might affect his or her life negatively. Anxiety is something no one can escape from, since is all produced in person’s mind. Therefore, I advise you face it, find what thoughts trigger that, examine the validity of such thought, and replace with logical and positive ones. If you follow such mode it will help subside your anxiety; try it regularly, you will feel better!

04

Beijing schools may start in one month or later. What psychological preparations do you recommend that parents and children should make?

A: Any lapse in our life routine even the happy time such as new year holiday, somehow might makes us temporarily detached psychologically from the real world we live in. People react differently when go back to work or kids go back to school after certain amount of off time. Some adults or children might experience some fear or anxiety going back and facing the tasks, collogues, classmate, waking up early, face the traffic etc.  Some of these feeling comes with life but if it becomes severe such as panic attack, high anxiety or sadness would need to get psychological treatment.

To cope with this problem, parents can have regular round table talk for whole family in which everyone talk about their feeling such as fear, anxiety or any issue. Then rest of family support the member and help with problem solving and positive tips.  If parents also follow the steps mentioned in question #2, I think all family members will be gladly looking forward to face going back to work and school.

About the Doctor

Dr. Mike Mehrvarz, Ph.D., PDBM
- Psychologist
- Child and Adult
- Individual, Couple and Marriage therapy
- Language: English, Chinese Mandarin, Farsi and Japanese
Dr. Mike is a Bilingual Chinese licensed, Child and Adult Psychologist. He specializes in Psycho-Educational assessment and treatment of Adult and Children age 0-18. He has been practicing in China over 20 years at IMC. Dr. Mike speaks fluent Chinese Mandarin and familiar with Chinese culture. 
Dr. Mike specialties include Psycho-Educational assessment, Depression, Anxiety, Panic Attack, Fear, OCD, PTSD, Insomnia, Dyslexia, Learning difficulties, Autism (ASD), ADD, ADHD, marriage and family therapy. 
Dr. Mike also offers online counseling and parenting skill to help families, children with different current and old difficulties. In comfort of your own home and privacy, can get help to overcome you and your child’s emotional difficulties.
*图片来自网络，侵权删

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